


Naive

by Amun_Ra



Category: Marvel, X-Men (Movieverse), X-Men - All Media Types, XMCU
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Depression, Drama, Drama & Romance, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Medicinal Drug Use, Rare Pairings, Romance, X-Men: Days of Future Past (2014), brief mentions of cherik
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-03
Updated: 2020-10-03
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:06:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26787931
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amun_Ra/pseuds/Amun_Ra
Summary: The Charles Xavier Institute for Higher Learning is anything but these days within empty halls: empty, save for two friends suffering in their own way. Both find themselves musing over their current situation and how their relationship has changed since Cuba. Is it naive to think things won't end the exact same way they did with other loved ones, or are they merely confused about what they are? A snippet of life post Cuba between Hank and Charles. Just one of many possibilities.
Relationships: Hank McCoy & Charles Xavier





	Naive

He supposed it was only a matter of time before something crazy happened. After all, the house was far too quiet; far too suffocating in its own right for two very depressed people to endure from day to day. One could only hide out in the lab for so long tinkering for no reason other than distraction before the distractions ran out. As for Charles, whiskey had a means of playing tricks on one’s mind, especially one as complex as his own.

The diagnosis from the doctors hadn’t been enough to put Charles in the state of mind he was currently in these days. On the contrary, after crying for several minutes alone, he unfroze time letting it resume as normal. His calm acceptance of his new reality had taken everyone by surprise, but he was Charles Xavier, leader of what was left of their mutant family. Breaking down over what he deemed as ‘fate’ at the time was not the way to set an example so he endured. 

For weeks on end, he seemed to endure with few being none the wiser. It was only after it became apparent that Erik was not going to let himself be found that Charles began to lose himself. It was subtle things at first. An extra drink after dinner. Even longer nights pouring over lessons. And then one morning he was late for his first class leaving someone else to fill in temporarily. Subtle things. Things that most children wouldn’t think much of until the professor stopped showing up for classes altogether.

He needed a break and so did Hank if they were being honest. Hank did a much better job than Charles pretending everything was fine, but Hank couldn’t see about Charles and run the school when Charles got slack and overslept. A decision was made to close the place temporarily, the excuse being renovations. Temporary was supposed to be a few months tops.

It ended up being a year and then some.

What the two friends soon discovered post life with the children was that Charles was not in a good place mentally at all. Even now, he knew he wasn’t in a good place, but it was much more tolerable without the voices. Oh, yes. It didn’t take Hank long to realize Charles loathed the idea of being aided with his condition. Having been a fiercely independent male before, his spinal injury had completely knocked him off of his axis. Now almost completely dependent upon Hank, Charles began openly showing signs of his bitterness. From slapping Hank’s hand away each time he moved to help him to insisting on doing everything himself, Charles behavior was nothing short of self destructive while Hank could do little except simply exist in Charles world.

He didn't have to. Lord knows Charles tried making Hank leave plenty of times. Everyone else was gone, many at Charles' insistence, but not Hank. Hank wouldn't leave, but it wasn't until now that Charles realized maybe Hank had reasons similar to his own.

  
  


Hank could recall sitting on the plane watching Charles and the others from afar in silence. Moira was hovered over him while Alex and others did their best to keep her spirits high. She was sobbing, blaming herself for what had happened when in reality it had been Erik's doing all along. His carelessness and penchant for letting his temper get the best of him had likely cost Charles the use of his legs for life. It was not yet confirmed, but being a man of science, Hank had an inkling. It was why he stayed his distance, mentally bracing himself to be the guy Charles would need when the news hit.

He didn't react.

Charles didn't react at all which struck Hank as odd given the diagnosis. Hank couldn't imagine anyone who enjoyed jogging, swimming and long evening walks taking kindly to the news he'd never walk again yet Charles merely answered quietly before the subject was tossed aside.

“I see. Thank you, doctor. I'm certain you've done all you can and for that, I am eternally grateful.”

That's it. That's all Charles had said. There were no tears – at least not enough to deduce Charles was wrecked inside. Maybe he was, but one would never know based on his reaction. It wasn't until recently that Charles confessed to having frozen time after the news. He had let it all out before the others could see him. He didn't want them to know just how hurt he was nor did he want their pity. Hank could understand this all too well. He'd never liked people pitying him either. Or maybe it was simply a 'mutant' thing. Either way, the drunken confession from Charles was another piece of the puzzle. Charles really did miss his legs and it made Hank's ire about the whiskey fade into oblivion. He still didn't like the idea of Professor X drinking so much, but it was much more understandable knowing that he was merely trying to come to terms with such a drastic change in his life.

Hank could be a little naive at times. He knew this all too well, but it was a quality that Charles once stated was endearing. After all, were they both nothing but naive fools? One believed mankind and mutants could live together in harmony someday while the other fool insisted on supported this ideal. According to Erik, they were both fools, but even his own foolishness should not have clouded his judgment as it pertained to Charles' drinking habits. The drinking was only getting worse so there had to be more to it than just a loss of legs. Raven maybe? But no. She left often in the past, wanting to break free from her little cage. That left Erik, but could Charles have really been this disparaged over someone he knew had a habit of leaving people behind?

Then he remembered the looks. They too were subtle at first, but looking back on it, maybe they weren't as subtle as he thought. There was that and the fact that the two of them took trips often in hopes of recruiting mutants. Long nights playing chess and drinking in celebration. How could they not have made a few mistakes? They were so in sync at times that they could finish each other sentences during conversations. It made more sense now – a lot more given the context. If Charles and Erik were a thing, then it made a hell of a lot more sense as to why Erik not answering the phone would hurt him so.

He guessed. Hank never coined Erik for the loving companion type. Charles was a good man. A sweet, wholesome, handsome man, but sometimes that's not enough for some people. It wasn't enough for Erik and Hank knew Erik had his reasons, but his own dislike of Erik meant he couldn't bring himself to make excuses for the metalkinetic. He left a good man behind in pursuit of his own dream. He wasn't going to condemn the man for sticking to his guns, but he didn't have to like the fact that he left Charles in the manner that he did. He could have at least said goodbye or something. But then he realized his revelation about Charles was a harsh reminder about his own feelings.

She left too. Raven had left them too and considering the way she looked at 'Magneto' it was painfully obvious to Hank that he might as well let that dream die too. They'd both been burned after having the balls to believe the family they had built would not simply crumble under adversity. However, at the first hint of it – the first real test down in Cuba – all of it had fallen apart. Perhaps they were never a family at all. Just merely playing at one. It was thoughts like these that were partly to blame for the new mistakes being made these days, but he knew the truth. And the truth was that he needed this just as much as Charles. It was just a distraction; a break from the usual techniques that they used to get through each day. It was a somewhat healthier alternative to the other things because he knew no harm could be done when hearts longed for other people right?

It didn't feel that way tonight and he hoped to god this wasn't going to turn into another lesson about naivety. He knew he was naive but this? Being naive about this was simply out of the question. They were barely holding on these days. He didn't need to make things worse.

Quite the thought to have while hovering over the man whose lips he was preparing to devour again. He told himself the last time that it would be the last time. Hell Charles probably said the same thing too. The problem though was that Charles kept leaving his door unlocked and for Hank, that was as open an invitation as any being that he used to lock the door for days on end...

The first time it happened, it had taken them both by surprise. Not so much because Charles didn't find Hank attractive. He just thought they were too close as friends to cross any lines. But then he realized just how stupid that probably sounded. Was that not how he and Erik ended up in bed? Ugh, no. He didn't want to think about it and honestly, that's all the drinking was about. It helped him not think and before the cure, it temporarily distorted the voices giving him some peace of mind. Hank's cure though... now **_that_ **was the real deal. No voices. No accidental projections. Just him and his own thoughts which were awful in their own right, but he could sleep at night. That's all he truly wanted after weeks of simply existing like a zombie on this plain.

He wasn't dosed at the time. Hank had come into his room to administer the treatment, but the air was different and... he didn't know. He was half naked in bed, messy hair scattered about his pillow while Hank was seated next to him. He remembered Hank's fingers lightly brushing his arm in the manner that he always did when searching for a vein. The feeling had caused a shiver to course through his spine but he thought no more of it. Knew it was because he had grown accustomed to being touched and the one who did the touching was no longer around. It was a reaction out of longing – plain and simple. It wasn't an invitation to Hank or anything really. His body simply reacted and he was prepared to shrug it off after his dose and sleep as he always did. That's not what happened though.

Bright blue eyes met Hank's own. Knew he was probably wrestling with the same things they always did. Was this right or wrong? What was going to happen when the school opened up again? ( If it opened up again in Charles' mind. ) Did this mean anything? Was this going to end as badly as it did with the two that left them behind? There were so many questions swimming about the heads of two people who were just using each other as a means of distraction but something felt off tonight. Even half drunk and without the full power of his telepathy, Charles could sense the change. Was it him? Was it Hank? Was it the both of them?

Fortunately Hank put them out of their misery for now. Their lips met and beneath the covers Charles spread his legs for him, but it wasn't going to be sex. Not tonight. No. This was one of those nights where simply lying with each other while they eventually drifted off to sleep was more than enough to satisfy certain needs. Charles' hand came to rest atop Hank's head, massaging his scalp in a manner that rarely failed to send him off from his own troubled mind. As for Charles, at one time he was reminded of the way he'd do this for Raven and then later, Erik Lehnsherr. Now? He didn't think of Erik or Raven while Hank slept soundly atop of his broken frame. He thought of Hank, his best friend and caretaker. He thought of all the reasons why this was wrong and how mistakes were being made. But then he'd force himself to forget; to live in the moment and simply thank god that someone needed him just as much as he needed them.


End file.
